surviving vs. thriving

Sometimes I feel like I barely make it through each day, not really enjoying it. I hate the feeling when I am SO excited as the kids finally get into bed and fall asleep. I am determined to enjoy each day more, and not just survive through it.

I have made a conscious effort this week. I feel like I am at such a turning point with Tanner. I adore that boy more than I can tell you but we have had a rough go. But he has just become so fun! This morning we laid on my bed for a half hour, just playing. He makes faces, he knows how to tease me, and I love this critical part of our relationship where we are laughing and interacting so closely. Laughing feels so good! It is a great feeling to feel like I finally "get" Tanner and accept who he is, impossibly obnoxious habits and all. He has a fun personality and I love getting to know him more as a boy rather than as a baby. I love drinking fresh-squeezed juice with him every day (his request), and going to the park and pushing him in the swing for 45 minutes until he starts to nod off.

Another thing I really have enjoyed this week is spending some time with Tyler. Spencer and I talked a couple weeks ago about how he sometimes slips through the cracks. He is quiet and easy and if he's not bugging me, asking me for things (he almost never is), I often give him less attention than the other two. But Tyler has a hobby, and it's actually a talent too - games. He loves to play games and we would play games all day if it was up to him. Instead of telling him "no" this week after school/homework, I pulled out "Sorry" one day and asked him if he wanted me to beat him. I did beat him...but then we played a few more games and he beat me every other time.

The game he likes most of all is Ticket to Ride. Do you play that game? Spencer taught the kids last year how to play and they have been hooked ever since. However, we now have it on our phones and on the ipad, and playing electronically is really fun because the device moves everything for you, and the game goes a lot faster. Tyler loves that game. He was used to losing every time he played Spencer so last Sunday when Spencer was at meetings I sat down with Tyler and showed him how to WIN. I showed him how to piggyback routes so he could get more points, and a few other little strategies. Needless to say...Spencer is no longer undefeated, much to his dismay. Tyler "practices" every free second (when I will let him), and he is getting really good. He is a lot of fun, and he is such a good sport.

And sweet Emma. We had been anticipating news about the swim team she tried out for a few weeks ago. Last night I got the call...they had no room for new swimmers because of so many who signed up this year. She cried for a minute (so disappointed!) but handled it so well! When we are at the ball fields she will take all the little boys and collect trash with their "help" so they can get Red Vines from the snack shack. She is a little pied piper, that girl. I love watching the little 1-4 year old boys follow her around. I am sure someday I will be watching much older boys following her around... :(

You know, I enjoy having more fun with my kids, and being more fun. I've had so much less stress this week in doing that and in not being distracted. I love not feeling like I should do the happy dance when my kids are finally in bed...I can just look forward to playing with them more the next day. Even if it means getting beat in a game by my 6 year old.