Thursday, January 23, 2014

A new phase

(I am posting this from the bathroom, watching my two littles splash and play in the tub...)


I feel like the first many years of our marriage revolved around planning our babies. Once one was born we knew we had some time before the next but soon enough we were figuring out when another would join. It seemed like most things we got to look forward to revolved around births. And with babies, we throw ourselves into that crazy realm of babyhood and it takes forever to slowly crawl out from the depths of the chaos, just to start all over again.


We are done having kids (which makes me sad, because Sadie is at the age when I usually start thinking about having another...). And 4 kids is a lot. They are a big responsibility. They take up a lot of my time. But in terms of having another tiny human, that phase of life is over.


Here are the top 10 things I am looking forward to in the foreseeable future:


1. Raising the kids. Obviously I have been "raising" a couple of my kids for longer than the others. But I feel like we are entering the phase of life where I have to be on my game. I am up for it, and I can't wait. Junior high (yikes) and high school are coming, dating is coming in just 6 years (!), driving is coming, college, missions, etc. Emma will be gone in 8 1/2 years! What on earth!?


2. Planning our dream house. I don't know if we will live here forever, though it is quite likely. My goal in the next year or two is to decide if we turn our current house into our dream house. (Assuming this is that house) I am excited to make it just how we want it, with extra bedrooms for guests and future in-laws and grandkids. But sooner than that I want more space for my kids to have friends over whenever they want. I want my house to be their gathering place as much as possible. These things are important to me, things I think about all the time. We need more space...someday. Right now I just dream about it, but soon it will need to become reality.


3. Events. I hated high school. I wasn't really super involved, and I want my kids to enjoy it more than I did. I am excited for sports events, for church events/dances, for things that should be enjoyable and fun for them. They already do some sports and piano but I look forward to all the rest of the chaos that will clutter our calendar and make life that much more interesting.


4. Traveling. I have this weird habit - if I am watching TV or overhear something about a place, and I don't know where it is, I immediately look it up on google maps. I would love to drive (sans kids, mind you) across the country, exploring the far corners of North America. With just a map in my hand. And Spencer driving, so I could look around. I am fascinated by geography.
I also want to explore certain parts of Europe - the south of France and all of Italy, for example. But I would be just as happy driving through Louisiana, Florida, Georgia, and South Carolina (the one part of the country I haven't yet been to). I have come to hate roadtrips because I am always turned around keeping people happy and fed. Doing this without people, and just with a person sounds dreamy.


5. Service. I decided recently that I want my kids to see me happily do service for others. Once, a few years ago, the compassionate service leader called and asked me to take dinner to someone. I think I was pregnant and it was a hard time for me. I politely declined, then felt horrible for a few hours and called her back to apologize and accept. I have noticed that I can easily make someone a meal and take it over, but when I do it by choice - willingly - I am so much happier. I want my kids to jump at the chance to do service, and not always have to be asked. I am working on this. I think it is important. I also want this to extend to the community, not just to those in my church who need extra help...
This applies to all forms of service. I know I won't have more time when I have older kids, but I will have the ability to serve more when I'm not holding a baby all day.


6. Callings. This goes with #5 a little bit. Spencer and I love our callings. We have loved all of our callings, which is part of it I think. When I recently thought about getting a new calling, one that didn't require nearly as much of my time, it made me so sad! I am excited to put more time into our callings, as we will have kids that can be home alone occasionally. I treasure the time I get to be with my friends from church.


7. Exercise. I know that soon i will have more freedom to exercise. I won't be tied to a treadmill {before the kids are up} or the living room, or anything else. I hate to exercise, but I love how it makes me feel.


8. Be more involved in the school. As long as my kids are in public school I need to be as involved as possible. This year I bit off more than I could chew by agreeing to be on the PTA Board over Membership. I keep thinking that I need to do those things that will impact my kids the most. I love love love teaching FAME (art/music). I adore seeing my kids and their friends get so excited when I walk in. I love teaching them valuable lessons that are mostly absent from schools these days. I want them to experience culture and how these things feel. I hope to do more of this when I am not holding a baby all day. :) PTA is important. But I'd rather be in their classes. I taught last week and Emma soaked up every second of it. Most importantly, I get little glimpses of my kids' friends.


9. Temple Service. This is another thing that falls under the Service umbrella. I used to think I wanted to work when my kids were older. (And trust me, I still have dreams of teaching AP English to high schoolers...) But I am starting to think that I never want to work. I want to keep my house clean (imagine that!) and I want to work in the temple. Being in the most heavenly place for one day a week...I can't imagine anything better.


10. Date! Emma is so close to being our baby-sitter, I can taste it! One reason we don't go out much is the cost. And that Sadie doesn't like people. ;) We have been aiming for a date night 3 weeks out of 4. Lots of times we stay in. I feel like having a couple baby-sitters in a couple of years will allow us a lot more freedom to get out and just TALK, away from the distractions of home. Can't wait.

3 comments:

Carly said...

I hated road trips all growing up and before I had kids. HATED them. Now I laugh at myself. I didn't have anyone to take care of and I hated it? What was I thinking!? :-) Funny that I now also think a big road trip without kids sounds amazing.

YES for having a built-in babysitter!!!

Mark and Kim said...

Well if you make it out for a road trip in the next year and half, you have a place to stay in North Carolina!!

hales said...

Yup -- built-in babysitters are the best. Of course, 10 years down the the road from THAT you will start hearing all sorts of stories that happened at home when you left your kids to babysit each other.