may

I can't believe May is almost over. June means school gets out and summer is creeping in. I am so excited!

Here is our May re-cap. Oh, and I am exhausted, for the record.

Emma is loving tennis. I have pictures of her somewhere, but can't find them.

Baseball. Oh, baseball. It takes up at least 3 of our nights/afternoons a week. Here Spencer is pitching to Tyler while Sadie looks on.

 Let's get a closer look at the back of this cute head. The curls kill me. So jealous.

I went south for Girls Weekend. Here I am with my mom and sister in Solvang. My friends up here have already decided we need a girls trip to Solvang sometime soon.

 Snapped this on our morning walk. Boy oh boy, going on a walk without pushing a stroller and without whining kids who need constant snacks or toys is so refreshing! I could have gone all day.

Paddle boarding might have been my favorite part. My board was not my favorite, but I think I got a good workout...

Sadie started Nursery on Mother's Day. She's not a fan yet.

It was open house at the school. Tyler had hurt his foot so he hobbled around to show us his class. Mr. Schneider really likes him; it's nice when you are the teacher's pet.

 Ms. Weidinger is about to become Mrs. Smith. Emma has enjoyed this year so so much, and her teacher really loves teaching - that is a huge breath of fresh air.

Gualala time came again. The weather was remarkable and it would have been totally perfect, except for... Sadie. She wasn't feeling well (we never did figure it out), and she managed to cry almost the entire time we were there, remarkably.

There was a lot of friend time...

And a LOT of log jumping...

Even Tanner got in on it (he can be bribed, this one).

Spencer jumped off for the first time. Emma was on her 15th jump here.

Tyler spent his time at the river playing with a frog. Or a toad?

We spent Memorial Day at the beach in Santa Cruz. It was gorgeous.

 More baseball...

This one is usually pretty messy when we are at a game.

 We hit 99 degrees during a 3 day heat wave. Yikes...

 These kids love hanging out in the motor home.

I think June will slow down a little. No more Scouts or baseball. Now we can just play!

mother's day

We kind of have a tradition of going to the cemetery on Mother's Day. Our usually empty cemetery is FULL of people, and I love the interaction we sometimes get there. Several years ago when we were there we met a lady who had lost her only little girl a few years earlier. She came to us and said she had seen us on the day of Macie's funeral. This lady was kind but I could tell she was completely devastated still, and she just looked so hopeless. We told her she will get to see her daughter again. I remember Spencer kicking himself that we had no pass along cards or anything to give to her.

On Sunday it was Mother's Day. My 10th Mother's Day. It was also Sadie's first day of nursery. (Here we are doing "Three cheers for Sadie going to nursery!" She wasn't convinced. And she hated it...but that is not what this post is about...)

We got a ping pong table from Debbie (our neighbor) and finally got it set up so we told the kids that playing ping pong will NOT be a regular Sunday activity...but we had to try it out. Everyone is a fan. And I even beat Spencer once.

Then we went to the cemetery. This time we met a nice lady who has a grandson buried in BabyLand, right next to Macie. I like getting to know loved ones of our loved one's neighbors. She also told us her daughter was buried close by, and had died a few years after her son had passed. This lady was there scrubbing bronze headstones, as well as spraying WD-40 to enhance the shine. She sat there looking solemn and it broke my heart.

Sadie and Emma walked around and then it was time to go. Sadie freaked out and wouldn't let me put her in her carseat. So I listened to her and took her back while everyone else waited in the car. She stood by Macie's grave for a little while longer and then didn't object to leaving. She is hard and she frustrates me a lot, but she is a sweetheart and I know she understands quite a bit.

It was a great day for me, as always. I have such a blessed life.

yosemite take 2

Yosemite has sure become one of our family's favorite places. This week is spring break. A few weeks ago Spencer asked me what we were doing over spring break so I got online and after hitting refresh for a day or two, saw that two nights were available (campground) in Lower Pines. So we booked our trip to Yosemite but didn't tell the kids because we wanted to watch the weather and possibly have an "out" if we needed it. About 10 days before we decided we would go no matter what. I mentioned it to my dad and a few days later he was coming too! He just retired, and with that is a certain amount of freedom. We were excited to meet up with Papa. It was so fun to reminisce about Yosemite with someone who had more memories and could help me remember things from ~24 years ago.

Sadie was excited to go...

We got there and within a few minutes she had broken the campsite in.

Papa came and we had Easter dinner (ham, funeral potatoes, rolls, and salad). Then we went on a bike ride around Curry Village and up to Mirror Lake. We saw several deer.

It was amazing to see how much higher the water was than last year when we were there in June (we were sitting in the middle of this pool last year...on the "sand").

On Monday morning we hiked up to Vernal Falls. Last year when we did it, it was 30 degrees warmer, and it was definitely harder then. This year my dad was there to carry a kid (yay!) part of the time. Last year the falls seemed full but we only got misty for a minute and it felt wonderful. This year the waterfall was bigger and more wind made us WET as we went up as well as down. It was cold. Still fun. Tyler hiked with a sprained ankle!

After Vernal we were pretty wiped so we rested at camp for an hour and then headed out on bikes to the Visitor Center and Yosemite Falls.

The kids got their junior ranger stuff and worked hard that night to get their badges before we left the next day.

On Tuesday morning it was cold and rainy, and it even hailed! Dad got ready to go home because the weather was ridiculous, but his car battery was dead. We jumped it but the weather cleared and then he decided to stay a bit longer with us (check out was at noon) and we are so glad he did! We went back up to Mirror Lake and then parked near Yosemite Village to do a few more things before heading out.

What a fun 42-hour trip! We love this place. (Dad's picture.) Can't wait to go again!

march madness

March was crazy. Most of us were sick for a majority of it. Sadie got her first ear infection. Lots of church stuff/calling stuff going on. Baseball.

 Bike rides and slurpees

 MudCats

 Ear Infection

 Antibiotics make everything better.

 Watching baseball.

 Provo for 36 hours

Blue and Gold father/son cake decorating.

memories

Often, my first instinct when approached with something "difficult" is to just say no. Spencer and I are good together because we both have this trait...but almost always at different times.

When our kids were both really small and we were in Boston I never wanted to do anything fun, because pretty much everything seemed "too hard." Really, my life was just hard - Spencer left for work every morning at 5:45 and got home between 9 and 11 pm. And he worked most Saturdays. The kids never saw him except for Sunday (he was ward mission leader so we would see him for a few hours only), and by then they had forgotten him enough that they just wanted me. When Spencer did get some time off, or when I got up enough gumption to try something adventurous on my own it was so tempting but also so daunting. The funny part of all of this is that I never felt like it was hard at the time. That was just life - everyone has to struggle and luckily I was raised to never feel entitled to anything, and it was a stepping stone, or a rung on the ladder. So we still got to do some amazing East Coast things - Washington DC (twice!), NYC, Maine, NH, Cape Cod, etc.

I am realizing more and more that we have to do those hard things that will create memories. I am bad at SO many things in life, but one thing I am pretty good at is documenting our activities. Emma and Tyler, and now even Tanner love looking through our scrapbooks and blog books again and again. If there is something they don't remember (because they were too young) they will ask me about it and inevitably be so happy that it is documented anyway so they know they were included.

We have been talking recently about a trip we took almost 6 years ago to Yellowstone. Emma only remembers snippets of it, and Tyler doesn't really remember anything (he was 2). But he loves (!) looking at the pictures and seeing that he was there. Tanner even loves it, and enjoys hearing how he was in heaven then.

I grumble a lot about doing these big trips that are a lot of work and cost a lot of money, especially when the motorhome is involved. Having 6 people in 300 square feet isn't easy - it makes staying in a small hotel room seem like a luxury. But my kids talk about Yosemite and Gualala and the Grand Canyon and Aspen Grove (and of course Disneyland) with the fondest memories - this has been a good reminder to me that just because things are expensive (it's just money) and because I know Sadie will cry the whole time and everyone will get off schedule doesn't mean we shouldn't make those memories anyway. Because they just remember for the fun/incredible parts. 

Because I am such a good documenter I am always trying to picture how those moments will feel in the future. We try to live in anticipation of the memory, which helps me to have a slightly better attitude and to make the most of what we do. My kids are adventurous, and I am thrilled that they are this way. And I am glad Spencer is so insistent that we do these fun, HARD things because my kids are so so grateful for the memories, and even for the pictures of the forgotten memories...

my number one

I have always known that the spouse is THE most important person. Kids always come after. But man that is hard sometimes. That focus isn't always easy for me, because I feel like I give everything to the kids and then I'm just tired. It's hard to take time for a marriage sometimes! Especially with little kids.

Spencer had a recruiting trip planned to Utah, part of that being a presentation to the students at BYU. He really wanted me to come. And it did sound fun. But we had stuff going on, a baseball game, the ward talent show, etc. After trying to work out flights and everything else I finally threw up my hands and said, "This is too hard; I am staying home." Spencer said something to the effect of, "This is important to me. I really need you to come." He doesn't often do that, so I took note and decided we would make it work.

My mom had an appointment so we flew my newly-retired (!!) dad up to watch the kids for 36 hours. We did the hand off of the kids/car at the airport (pretty sure Sadie was 100% confused) and hopped on our flight. I thoroughly enjoyed the flight (other than that I didn't get to sit next to Spencer) - I sat by a friend and we had some great conversation. I hadn't seen her in a few months.

We got off the plane and called Melissa, who just recently moved to Stansbury Park. We got to go see their family and their new BIG house. Then it was time to head to Provo. We quickly check in to the hotel, I ironed his clothes while he prepped for the presentation, and we went to BYU. I love being back there but I feel so far removed from my time there. Every time I visit it is SO different. He of course did awesome; he is so comfortable speaking in front of people.

That night we went to dinner (Old Spaghetti Factory - meh) and then were on a mission to find BYU mint brownies. We went all over campus and no place had them. Lame!

The next morning was EY extreme. I did some shopping (found skirts for the girls for Adam's wedding!) and then met up with Spencer on campus for lunch. He has some great candidates interested in the San Jose office. We were there a few hours, then headed to Matt and Mary's in Salt Lake to help Matt with some tax stuff. Then back to the airport for a quick meal at Cafe Rio (YUM) and onto our plane. We got home right as the talent show was ending, and my dad's flight left about 10 minutes before ours landed.

The kids were in great hands. I think Sadie was a stinker but I expected nothing less (more?)

Sometimes it's good to get away for a minute; I'm glad I did this time. Thanks Dad!